I’m so sorry that I almost ruined your Valentine’s Day.  Really.  If you decided to go with the Saving Private Mommy At Home Dinner, you were probably interested in finding out what the MAIN COURSE would be at least fifteen minutes before you sat down to eat it.  I’m sorry that I got a bit buried and distracted by talking cupcakes and seasonal verbs.  I hope that I’m catching you before you went to the meat counter, and that you haven’t sought out some time-consuming help in the unkind embrace of a recipe from Martha Stewart. She’s lovely, but such a Nazi about measuring, and she would never let you sneak in a jar of sauce like I will, if you choose.

This chicken parmesan recipe is the lead actor in an all-star, Valentine’s Day, Broadway cast of foods.  After a bruschetta overture, followed by caesar’s opening scene, chicken parmesan will enter the stage costumed in a baked coat of golden breading, with tangy sauce and cheese to make the scene truly climactic. With  a heart-shaped brownie denoument, the rest of V-day 2010 will be history.  Let’s get cookin’, good lookin’.

• First you need to Rachel Ray the chicken:  butterfly a boneless, skinless CHICKEN BREAST (one per person) and stick it in a ziploc bag with a splash of water in it.  Take a heavy saucepan and beat the shit out of it. Do this until it’s thinner.

• Whisk an EGG or two in the bowl.  Combine BREAD CRUMBS and PARMESAN CHEESE at a one-to-one ratio, maybe a cup or so if you want. You’re the boss. Dredge (I love that word) the chicken breast in the egg first, then the bread crumbs.

• Place it in a baking dish that has been greased with OLIVE OIL.  I’m at a point in my life where I pretty much won’t tell you to make anything without drizzling olive oil on it.  So do that, please. Thanks.  Bake in the oven at 375 degrees for about 25 minutes or until golden.

• Meanwhile, back at the stove, you cook some spaghetti noodles until they are almost done.  You drain them and let them sit in the sieve and continue to cook.  You didn’t do for them what they could easily do for themselves.

• Remove chicken from the oven and top with a seasoned TOMATO SAUCE, either Spaghetto, your personal, homemade favorite, or a jarred variety.  You pick.  Boss.  Top with more parmesan cheese.  The more, the merrier.

• Return to oven for about 5 minutes or until the cheese is melted.

• Place the cutlet on a bed of noodles.  Spoon on additional sauce to your taste.  Tell your heart that you didn’t fry the cutlet; don’t tell this to your Valentine.  He/she won’t even notice.

Have a great dinner.  Don’t forget the wine.  You might choose sparkling wine to go with the bruschetta, and then transition to red for the chicken.  If you end up naked at the end of this meal, you’ll know you are an excellent cook.

We’re celebrating 14 Days of Love and Food!  Check back tomorrow for Day 11 of musings on various matters de la corazon.

RE-RE-RE-RE-REPOSTED SHAMELESS PROMOTION AND AQUA ALERT:  If you like this blog, please vote for Saving Private Mommy on Babble.com.  Greta has made the TOP 100 Bloggers list already, and is seeking a position in the TOP 50!  What a greedy little whore.  Go to Babble’s website.  You’ll find Saving Private Mommy on or around page 2. Greta thanks you for your support!