Talking Cupcake

February 10th, 2010 | Author: Greta

That little sweet beauty is a tiring step toward redemption. It’s tiring because it was made between 9:30 PM and midnight. It’s redemptive because it’s a cute, tasty little cup of dessert that could be likely to deliver the following monologue, in a high-pitched voice much like Mr. Bill. No, exactly like Mr. Bill.

Yay, we’re having a holiday all up in here and never mind that not a single glitter heart was hung in the house, despite the children’s frequent request for decorations. And I’m so cute and pink and fluffy that when I arrive at school in the Martha Stewart carrier, no one will remember who has the highest math score in the class or that Kimmie is mean to Zoe. My holiday cuteness will even distract from the awkwardness from the Traffic Circle Bully’s showing up at the party and acting weird around the moms and kids she yells at before 8:30 in the morning. And we won’t remember that this HIGH PERFORMING MAGNET SCHOOL (at which I will take my plunge into the Great Beyond, at the eager bite of some squirrelly second-grader), could possibly be shut down next year due to budget cuts, which will secretly or, not-so-secretly, be enjoyed by parents at other schools who despise its elite status. Yes, I chase away the anxiety that some children have over their lisps and their undiagnosed dyslexia, and I will make everyone think that the one who baked me is more likable than usual because, well, vanilla paste is good and how bad can someone who brings cupcakes be, even though her two-year-old spent the whole day inside without a good walk or trip to the park or time to attempt jumping rope? We won’t mention the laundry either. Yes, I will be a self-contained explosion of perfection. With a Ju Ju Heart on top. So even though it sucks to make me late at night when one could be checking email or getting some zzzzz’s or chatting with the man or woman of the house, I am worth it. I erase all that is imperfect. I bury it, suffocate it, in fact, under a thick layer of butter, powdered sugar, and food coloring that came all the way from Woodridge, IL. Where the hell is that?

Okay, little cupcake. Enough! Shut up and get in the box.

We’re celebrating 14 Days of Love and Food! Check back tomorrow for another heart-shaped blog.

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